So next weekend is my Birthday and also a friend from college's wedding. On the same day no less. I'm feeling a little apprehensive about going to this little shindig. First of all, its all the way out on Long Island. Second, I haven't seen the girl (prior to her bridal shower - see previous bridal shower blog lol) in almost 2 years!! We occasionally talk on the phone, but haven't really kept that in touch. Everyone else invited from our college days is still really close with her. This leaves me feeling a little out of the loop.
Besides this...I'm anticipating having some kind of break down. I was invited to the wedding with a guest...but being that I attract losers from both near and far, I decided to attend on my own. Maybe not the brightest decision. So now, on my 26th birthday...hoping the 25 year old fence that leads me to 30, I'll be at a wedding, alone, with lots of free booze. (At least there is a silver lining right??) Don't misunderstand. I'm ok with being alone and am perfectly capable of being social. I guess its possible that society is having a larger effect on me than I ever thought. 26 for some reason seems like marriage age. Like babies age. Like I should have my shit together age. Am I wrong?? I know I'm not alone in this...but sometimes it feels like I am.
I just finished a cute little book called Tabloid Love. I liked it a lot. It was entertaining. In the book the woman breaks it off with her boyfriend of 5 years in order to move to NYC and become a reporter. She says that even though she knows it is right the only time she KNEW she was over it was when she could picture him living a future that did not include her. I just really identified!! Mr. Met sends me to occasional email and to update me I guess. He has a new girlfriend of about 5 months...and even though I hate his guts most of the time...it kills me inside that he gets to move on with life and I don't. The toddler in my still wants him to suffer and be miserable and have no future at all. So I guess its not the fact that he is moving on without me...but the fact that he is moving on at all that bugs me the most.
Wedding always bring out this sentimental crap. Well, here is to hoping the groom has some single cute friends. (Is it too late to back out and just send a gift?!!?)